Random Access Memories

I realized something wandering around downtown yesterday that struck me like a brick upside the head.

As I was searching for menswear in Nordstrom and Macy’s I saw that the women’s fashions were of extensive varied colors and patterns, with a myriad of cuts, shapes, florals. etc.

However upon entering the menswear department I was suddenly and completely transported to 1950 or thereabouts. The colors were drab and boring and the cuts of the suits, shirts and shoes were indistiguishable from those being in fashion 60 years ago.

As I stood taking in this realization I was approached by a member of the sales staff who intoned “Is there anything I can help you find sir?”, after a moment to realize it was me he was speaking to I responded “Yes, variety”, his quizical stare and raised eyebrow making it clear he had no idea what I meant I added “This is all very, very old, where is the new men’s fashion?”.

Without any hint of sarcasm or comedy he replied “Men’s fashion does not, and will never change sir”.

Needless to say this was not an answer befitting my state of mind at the time so I took my leave of the place, but the issue still hung in my mind, “Why is men’s fashion so stagnant?”.

When I returned home I started searching for something different or new in men’s fashion trends thinking that the web (which obviously knows everything and has connected several billion people) might show some promise.

I then realized the horror of my situation, that almost all the variety in men’s fashion is lumped into “alternative” fashion. You know this type of fashion, the looks that your parents thought were completely unacceptable and that somewhow 99% of adult men grown out of upon exiting high school or college.

I believe I shall have to find a custom tailor and begin my quest to write this terrible injustice that men now suffer, or (lord forbid) do the unthinkable and learn to sew myself.